WHEN I TELL YOU YOU’RE STUCK - A MEDITATION

LISTEN TO THE MEDITATION ↑

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A guided meditation for fertility and loss.

Traditional Chinese medicine says that a) a desire to control, and b) unfulfilled desires, tend to make us become ‘clenchy’ and energetically stuck. Hellooooo, infertility much?!

But it's not just infertility! Work. Social media. Social justice. Grief and loss. And so many other parts of our messy and oh-so-human lives can totally make us want to control — and also feel out of control. All for very legit reasons.

As always, it's not about magically turning these feelings off. It's about reframing and doing something super skillful when you do have them. It’s about turning lemons into lemonade. Or as a recent patient said, “It’s about turning a collapsed mess of a chocolate cake into cake-pops!”

And that’s exactly what this meditation is about. It's especially great if you have these signs of being stuck:

• Tension and pain

• Headaches

• PMS

• Cramps

• Circulatory concerns like cold hands and feet

• Irritability, anger, or frustration

• You rely on exercise or alcohol to stay relaxed and need some healthier options

We're all a little clenchy and stuck these days, so why not pause what you're doing and give it a try right now. You can listen to When I Tell You You’re Stuck using the video link above, and the meditation transcript is below. You can also find all of my guided meditations using this link.

In less than 8 minutes you can work on this whole list and your fertility at the same time!

I’m glad we get to be human together,

Nicole

Nicole Lange

LICENSED ACUPUNCTURIST
HOLISTIC FERTILITY EDUCATOR

• VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

  When I Tell You You’re Stuck: A Meditation

  by Nicole Lange

  When you’re running from place to place, thing to thing, when your mind is two steps ahead … ten steps ahead. When you feel like you are barely treading water but you’re afraid you’ll sink if you don't keep going as fast and as hard and with as much willpower as you can muster. When you can't not do. When you can't turn off. When you can't stop. When you can't “not."

  This is stuck.

  When you desperately want something to change that you are (ultimately) powerless to control. When there is injustice. When things aren’t one-bit fair. When it’s life and death and you keep bumping up against those hard edges and they just won’t give. When you tried every different angle, every different option, and it’s still unyielding or it only gives just enough to make you feel like slamming against it hard again.

  You are stuck.

  When you held someone but it wasn't long enough. When you can’t hold someone but your arms long to. When you don't want to hold onto something anymore because it’s too much. When you don’t know if you’ll ever get back to who you were before. When you can’t understand how everything and everyone else goes on when this is what YOU are living. When they think you’re okay, but you’re not.

  In this too, you are stuck.

  You are stuck when it hurts. Literally hurts. When things feel tight and tense. When they ache. When it feels like you’re being stabbed or wrung out. When it comes and goes and catches you off guard. When it won’t relent. When it’s exhausting. When you are painted into a corner. When it’s in your heart. When it’s in your head. When this is there, and also over there, and here, and here too.

  This is stuck.

  Even if you are stuck. Even if it’s for so many very real reasons. Even if this is SO VERY HUMAN. It won’t always feel this way. Time alone makes things change. It always does. You won’t always feel this exact way. And right now, even if you cannot change the things you want to, there ARE so many ways to offset, to ease up, and to redirect. Awareness is where you must start. Say to yourself, “I see I’m stuck. I see why.”

  "I am stuck. I am aware."

  Your breath is the perfect next step. Take a breath. Feel your inhalation. Feel the pause. Feel your exhalation. Be here for this moment. Breathe in again. Label the parts.

  I inhale. I pause. I exhale.

  And a third time. Breathe in. Pause. And out.

  "I am stuck. I am aware. I am breathing."

  And last but not least let self-compassion enter in. Now say, “I’m stuck. Being stuck is hard. I deserve kindness. I deserve love.”

  And take one more breath.

  Send yourself kindness.

  And then one more.

  Give yourself love.

  "I am stuck. I am aware. I am breathing. I deserve kindness. I deserve love."

  Even if this is all that you do here. Even if it changes nothing outside. It matters INSIDE.

  Feel the space it creates. Take one more breath.

  Know that this space offers room for hope. There are many ways to shift even more. Even here. But for just right now pause just a while longer. Be in this moment, breathe, be aware, and be kind.

  If you are stuck - you are human.

  The goal isn’t to stop being human, the goal is to learn how to lean in and work with it all and trust the rest will unfold. Take yet another breath. Spend a few more moments doing what feels right as the music comes to an end. Then wiggle your fingers and toes and see where this moment will take you.